How to Kill a Witch
“A surefire way to kill at witch, and another oldie, is to burn it at the stake”
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How to Kill Yourself
“your coworker, Chad walks by with a steaming Styrofoam cup and a disturbingly perfect smile of triumph”
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How to Kill a Computer Virus
“you’ve not only learned how to kill a computer virus but you have also saved a lot of money by doing it yourself.”
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How to Kill A Tree Stump
“You finally made the difficult decision to cut down the old family maple.”
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How to Kill Carpenter Ants
“What a waste of delicious wood!”
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How to Kill an Elephant
“When it comes to killing elephants there is only one true expert. Bob Parsons.”
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How to Kill Crabgrass
“Very hot weather is a bad time to kill. If cooler days aren’t on the horizon, try to spray in the evening or the early morning.”
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How to Kill Fire Ants
“While the fire ant has no natural enemies, it has certainly garnered quite a bit of angst from humanity”
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How to Kill Mosquitoes
“Mosquitoes are the real life vampires that roam the earth looking to suck blood from its victims.”
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How to Kill a Skunk
Killing Skunks If there is one animal in this world that seems to have no redeeming characteristics whatsoever, it is the skunk. A vicious, disease-bearing pest, it endears itself even …
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